Guys attempting to get to know girls in social situations often rely on alcohol to give them the confidence to chat freely. Increasing numbers of singles are now joining dating sites, where you might assume communication skills would be easier to master. Not so. The online environment requires even more focus when you want to start dating girls.
1. Chatting for Too Long with Your Matches
Part of the attraction of going online to meet other singles is the flexibility and convenience of this platform. But in many ways, this is no different from a social situation. How would you feel if you were in a bar, and someone engaged you in conversation, non-stop, while you were aware of other interesting-looking individuals hovering in the background, but being dissuaded from approaching you because you seemed to be so fully immersed in your important discussion? It’s no different with Internet dating.
2. Boring and Banal Phrases to Start Talk
The English language is full of cliches, and the very last place any of these dull, predictable, and unimaginative saying should appear is in a communication to a loved one. If you’re in a club or bar, coming out with something like, "do you come here often?" will only give the impression that you deliver lines – to any number of girls – rather than engaging in affable conversation. When you’re chatting on a dating site, things like, "I’m new to this" should be avoided. You want to come across as confident (even if this is your first experience).
3. Poor profile photo selection
What is the very first thing a prospective partner is going to notice about you? The image you have chosen to upload to your profile page. Dating sites are extremely popular resources, so you must stand out from the crowd. So make sure you select a striking portrait that is going to demand attention. This should preferably be taken with a good, high-definition camera, and not just a screenshot from your Facebook page. It would also be important to give an inviting smile, and not have any distractions in the background.
4. Grammatical Errors
You might think the intent behind a text message or email is all-important, but delivery is equally crucial. You could write the most eloquent piece of prose to someone you are interested in getting to know better. But if this is peppered with spelling mistakes and shoddy grammar, those are the aspects the recipient is going to notice, leaping out from the computer screen. The message you will convey will be more like, "I just rushed this because I’m not that keen on you, anyway."
5. Communication only with One Girl
Again, to use the offline scenario, until you come across someone you think might be ‘the one,’ you would never spend the whole evening chatting to one girl, would you? When you’re making the most of a dating site, take advantage of being surrounded by talent. You could always formulate a shortlist of girls you like to talk to the most, but you’ll get so much more out of the experience if you do the rounds, and engage with multiple site users.
It might seem as common sense should be enough to avoid these errors. Try telling that to the single males who keep making these basic blunders, and spoiling their chances. Far better to pay close attention to what you shouldn’t be doing – you might just impress that girl you’ve always been dreaming about.